Of Darkness and Despair
by Angst-Rabbit
Summary: Hermione builds her barriers, Draco locks his gates from the inside, but what if they let each other in? What if they learn that sometimes a true friend is all you need?


**Silver and Cold**

****

Author: Immortal-Rabbit

Disclaimer: I own nothing of Harry Potter or related objects.

Rating: PG-13, may be R in later chapters

Author's Notes: This is a re-write of a story that I was working on under a different screen name. I hope that this turns out slightly better than that one, so I can only hope.

------

_I...I came here by day, but I left here in darkness_

_And found, found you on the way_

_And now, it is silver and silent, it is silver and cold_

_You, in somber resplendence, I hold_

_Silver and Cold - A.F.I._

_------_

My parents...are dead.

I have nothing left to live for or so it seems. I have lost all the direction that I used to have. The pillars that held me up are now gone and all stability is lost to the winds. All that is left is the memories, the pictures, and nothing else. All that is left is me and for some odd reason, I feel changed. I feel different and now is the time when I need someone to help me.

I have not told anyone about my tragedy because I cannot bring myself to do so. Not even my best friends know and they should be the first to know if any. I just can't; it is not as easy as it sounds. I find myself on days just sitting at the foot of the stairs with my head in my hands waiting for my parents to come back through the front door and greet me lovingly. It never comes and somewhere in the back of my mind, I know that it will never come.

My parents left all of their possessions to me as well as our house and business. It pained me too much to live in the same house that my parents once lived in, so I sold it. I knew nothing of orthodonture, so I resorted to selling the business as well. Perhaps some mother and father would take over the business with their tiny daughter or son and make it their own. Perhaps some loving family would move into our house and find the love in it that I could no longer see.

I did not want to live in the muggle world anymore, so I indefinitely moved into the wizarding one. Fortunately, I was able to take all of the funds that my parents left me and deposit it into Gringotts, turning it into galleons, sickles, and knuts. In turn, I found myself a nice flat that could accommodate me and my things for an affordable price somewhere in Hogsmeade. Sometime in the next three months, I would have to build up some sort of life, some way of survival.

I could not let anyone in anymore. I had to build up barriers and gates, only to lock them from the inside. Already losing two people that were terribly dear to me seemed to make me feel alone and in a way, caged. I was now the only Granger left in the world that I now knew and nothing could be done to change it. For some reason, I could not cry, I could not feel, I could not function. I became something horrible, something undesirable....

I became dead.

...

Hermione walked down the streets of Diagon Alley, her eyes searching the stores for anything of interest. Passing the Quidditch store, the Owlery, and the wand shop, she came to stop in front of Flourish and Blotts; her only sanctuary. Leaning into the door, it fell open with a small _bing _as it hit the bell atop it. She walked in, hugging herself tightly as she ventured to the back of the shop where there were hardly any customers.

She walked down a few of the aisles, just looking over the spines of the book for anything that caught her attention. Her head was cocked slightly to the left for a better view of the books and her hand pushed over them, causing a few dust clouds to emerge. Hermione stopped in front of one section of books titled 'Behind the Looking Glass'. It seemed that all the books related with hiding behind something that you were not, either that or hiding within yourself. Plucking the first book off the shelf that she saw, she turned it over in her hands, fingers grazing the black, leathery binding covering it. On the front, in curving handwriting, was scrawled Death and its Decisions.

This title made Hermione smile and provoked her to open and read its contents. The spine fell open easily as if the book had been read numerous times before and was aged from its uses. The first page just repeated the title and its author unknown. It was the second page though that began the book itself and Hermione scanned over the first paragraph.

_Rain pounded harshly against the bay windows of the living room and thunder danced across the sky. It was an exact ally to the feelings that I was having, the feelings that had washed over me. The television sounded of flash flood warnings and my blood began to run cold. My stomach suddenly felt empty, not from lack of hunger, but from lack of something else; somebody else._

She slowly shut the book and tucked in under her arm, making her way back up to the register. Placing the book down on the counter, the clerk rang it up and Hermione handed him the correct amount of money. He bagged her purchase and she took it with a tiny smile and walked to the door of the store. Looking out the window that was built into the frame, she saw the clouds begin to gather in grey.

Stepping out of the shop, the wind whipped her hair back and forth across her face and Hermione turned to the direction of The Leaky Cauldron. Many of the witches and wizards that had crowded the alley when she had originally set foot here, had long since gone whilst the rest were inside the stores and shops. Ironically, that only left Hermione walking up the cobbled way with a few stranglers dotting places here and there. It was not until the rain started to fall that those few strangles joined the others inside, leaving her by herself.

She let herself be soaked and let the water penetrate her barriers. She let it cool her warm skin, flushing her cheeks, and slightly paling her lips. There was nothing else she could do. She was dead to the world, so who would mind if she froze in the rain and wind?

------

Author's Notes: Well, that is definitely a complete opposite of what I had previously written, but I like this. Also, before I forget; the first paragraph of Death and its Decisions was written by me, so it is copywrited to me. Other than that, thanks for reading and please review.


End file.
